Friday, October 03, 2003

RCB Guide's Cheers and Jeers

Jeers to Arnold Schwarzenegger for groping unwilling women. Jeers again to him for admiring Hitler in any capacity. Then again, maybe Adolf had a stunning physique that only Arnie knows about.

Jeers to Arianna Huffington for bowing out of the race. She was giving many Californians a good reason to go to the polls, and has subsequently abandoned them, no doubt under pressure from more likely victorious liberal candidates.

Cheers to Peter Camejo and Tom McClintock for not.

Cheers, further, to the people who made it possible for Peter and Tom to be involved in the gubernatorial debates. Cheers to a minor undermining of the strict two-party/two-candidate political system that limits the democratic potential of America.

Jeers to whoever decided to have the Giants' first three playoff games take place while most people are at work or school.

Jeers to midterms.

Cheers to the Heuristic Squelch, which stands as a beacon of entertainment in the face of said midterms.

Jeers to President Bush. For any number of things.

Jeers to "The Simpsons" for not being funny for almost half a decade.

Cheers to having all three seasons of "The Family Guy" on DVD to compensate for the previous Jeer.

Cheers to all the cool kids who run If Six Was Nine.

Jeers to this idiotic TV Guide format.

Cheers to Luna Bars, Clif Bar's high-density food chunk designed specifically for women. Each bar has 10 grams of protein (22% of its calories); 350mg calcium; 100% RDA of folate, vitamins C, B1, B3, B6, and B12, and some other stuff I've never heard of; and only 180 calories. Furthermore, Luna bars use no animal products, and because B vitamins are normally so difficult to find in large quantities in plants, these mid-meal snacks are ideal for us vegans. Yay!


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