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Campus personalities present and past Rebecca C. Brown and Tommaso Sciortino tackle the issues. This week on a very special CalJunket: Rebecca learns not to chew with her mouth open and Tommaso finds out his best friend is addicted to no-doze. Site feed: caljunket.blogspot.com/atom.xml
AIM Rebecca:
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Thursday, May 29, 2003
Good for the Philadelphia Boy Scouts for recently deciding that they would not deny admission from their organization based on sexual orientation. Let’s hope many other regional groups and, eventually, the national Boy Scouts follow their example. The Boy Scout guideline that seems to be dissuading other groups from allowing homosexual members is the code that scouts should be “morally straight.” This does not include gays, of course, who are consistently knocking over trashcans, kicking old women, and running up federal deficits. Oh, wait. Denying membership because of sexual orientation tells the other kids in Boy Scouts that being gay is wrong and precludes you from being a good citizen. More broadly, it tells them that discrimination is an acceptable form of admissions procedures. These are not the values that should be perpetuated among children, teens, or frickin’ adults for that matter. I very sincerely hope that America’s attitude towards homosexuality shifts in the near future. Same sex marriages are still illegal in all 50 states. Gays and lesbians are still not authorized to disclose their sexuality to the armed forces. Even anal sex between two consenting heterosexual adults is illegal in some states. And, with few exceptions, gay boys, girls, men, and women are not given the chance to serve their community through the Boy or Girl Scouts. This seems absolutely ridiculous to me. P.S. Like I mentioned, I’m here in Long Beach for a few days for my mom’s graduation. JetBlue is awesome. I watched CourtTV and VH1 Classics on the flight down. Long Beach is smoggy and the tap water tastes like feet. There aren’t enough trees, and the air is oppressively thick. Worst of all, the nearest Trader Joe’s is three miles from my house. (0) comments My sincerest apologies for the lack of postings. Y'know how it is, with the school and the job and the family and stuff. Sunday, May 25, 2003
In a move that should be shocking to no one, on Wednesday Florida governor Jeb Bush signed legislation that would extend the deadline for local sugar producers to clean up the Everglades from 2006 to 2016. (Click here for cnn.com's rendition, here for the National Resource Defense Council's version. Two very similar accounts of a decision that can only be seen as anti-environment, pro-business.) This is yet another example of (and please allow me to generalize here) Republicans' tendency to favor the short-term over the long-term, and to favor persons over people. I am consistently disgusted by this party's repeated neglect for the environment, and their deference to corporate interests, in this instance the Florida sugar farmers who want to continue contaminating the Everglades with phosphorous. In the short-term, lax anti-pollution legislation may facilitate a more prosperous and free economy because businesses will not have to invest earnings into reducing their emissions or disposing of their waste responsibly, which is indeed an expensive pursuit. This may allow corporations to spend more money on new jobs, or to increase the incomes of their low-level workers. Or in all likelihood, this will allow them to increase the profits of their shareholders and their managers. Pardon me if I don't expect altruism from corporate owners. In the long-term (and short-term, for that matter), legislation that abandons the environment and caters to corporate interests will lead to the destruction of natural habitats, the unjustifiable death of countless animals, and in some instances the extinction of certain species. Even if you can't muster up the enthusiasm to defend the rights of non-human animals, you have to concede that a diminished environment is harmful to the health of us homo sapien sapiens. The most ridiculous but nevertheless indicative comment I've heard/read on Jeb's new bill is from United States Sugar Corp. Senior Vice President Robert Coker: "When the environmentalists finish filing lawsuits, running negative TV ads and making speeches, maybe they'll join us in restoring the Everglades." Ha ha, Bobby C. Who's going to stop you from dumping pollutants into fragile environments if not us pesky, pinko environmentalists? The president? Last time I checked, running a public campaign to defend the environment does not preclude you from restoring the Everglades; you can do both at the same time. It's also fantastic that Coker wants the environmental interests to stop running ads and stop making speeches; is he perhaps afraid that once the general public is aware of these exigencies and aware that the sugar corporations are relentlessly polluting the Everglades that they might take action against it, up to and including protesting his company, or worse, ending their support for the politicians that buckle to corporate interests? The Democrats are not perfect when it comes to pro-environmental legislation. Frankly, the Democrats are not perfect when it comes to everything. I'll admit that freely. But to compare the Democrats' actions to the Republicans' complete disregard for all things environmental would be ludicrous. I genuinely fear for my well-being and the well-being of my grandchildren if the Republicans continue to be such a powerful political influence. I'm actually scared. While economies rise and fall with few permanent repercussions, the pollutants we allow to enter our environment are irretrievable. The species we kill cannot be brought back, nor can the lives of the animals and humans we damage because of our collective lack of concern for the preservation of our planet. The decisions we and our political "representatives" make today will affect our world long after we shrivel up and die a carcinogen-induced death. That is why people like Jeb Bush and his conservative brood frighten me. (0) comments More Postings About Sex!(!!) Wednesday, May 21, 2003
Yestderday afternoon I had too much free time on my hands (yes, my Spring semester officially ended Monday at 3:10pm), so I watched some MSNBC. First, Pat Buchanan & Bill Press were hosting a discussion about over the counter "morning after" pills, then Chris Matthews made a stop on his Hardball college tour to talk about whether American society is in moral decline. On the first program, the conservative panelists argued that the availability of morning after pills is (a) promoting teen promiscuity, and (b) bona fide murder. The conservatives gabbing with Chris saw repeated clips of Brittney Sears as an indication that this nation is indeed riding a bicycle with no brakes downhill into a busy intersection between disaster and damnation. It seems that the prevailing conservative voice believes that sex is curropting our modern society, and harkens back to the days of Leave it to Beaver and Donna Reed when television was wholesome. Our culture, they say, is constantly declining in a sea of commercialized sex, and would like us to revert to the culture of 40, 50 years ago. Here are a few statistics: -In 1950, there were 40.7 live births per 1000 women between the ages of 15 and 17. In 2000, that number was 27.4. -Between 1992 and 1996, the number of abortions per 1000 women decreased 12%. -From 1985 to 2001, cigarette smoking dropped from 38.7% to 24.9%. -Alcohol drinking has been steadily decreasing amond high school students since the class of '75. Their percentage of use was 73.6, while in 2001 that number was 61.0. What I'm trying to indicate is that our society isn't any "worse" than that of one, two, five decades ago. Even when you take into account the Baby Boom of the 1950s, teen birth rates have been decreasing for decades. My other beef with the "standard" conservative view is that for them sex is the most popular yardstick by which to measure the decline of moral society. It seems that preventing the implantation of a non-breathing, non-thinking zygote is morally aprehensable, yet dropping bombs is standard business. Why not gauge how well our society is dong by how many of us are killing each other? The nations we think of as the most violent - the ones with whom we're often at war - are the ones that demand the most sexual consevatism from their women. I'm by no means celebrating teen sex, but I'd sooner see (well, not really SEE, unless they invited me to) two consenting teenagers have intercourse than see another Iraqi civillian (or soldier, for that matter) with an arm missing. On the matter of emergency contraception, I am mystified as to why even a pro-life advocate would oppose these. First, they are not the same as the "abortion pill" RU-486. The latter actually terminates an existing pregnancy, while OTC emergency contraceptives like Preven (aptly named) "can stop or delay ovulation (the release of an egg), can stop sperm from fertilizing an egg if it was already released, and can stop a fertilized egg from attaching to the wall of the uterus." In other words, no "human" is being destroyed, unless your definition of human is not contingent upon having more than a handful of cells. The argument that a human is created the moment sperm meets egg is the same argument that is preventing stem-cell research from receiving federal funding. (C'mon, even Ronnie wants that one to happen.) In both cases, no fetuses are being harmed because there's no fetus to begin with. No brain, no lungs, no blood, no nervous system. What emergency contraception does is prevent unwanted pregnancy without damaging any humans. That's right, one less person to go on government assistance, if that's how you count people. (0) comments
Sunday, May 18, 2003
Why Have Cotton When You Can Have Shaudi Falamaki? Because Han Hong is Complicated Enough. There's More Than One Way To Eat A Kris Cuaresma-Primm. Jasper Cacananta. It's What's For Dinner. Choosy Mothers Choose Tasvir Patel. Snap Into A Slim John And Chris Fong. 151 Countries, One Misha Leybovich. Lipsmackin' Thirstquenchin' Acetastin' Motivatin' Goodbuzzin' Cooltalkin' Highwalkin' Fastlivin' Evergivin' Coolfizzin' Cliff Costa. Leggo my Ian Ackerman! Good to the Last Toney Falcone. Because Jesse Gabriel Can't Drive. Be Young, Have Fun, Drink Devin Andre. Snap! Crackle! Adnan Iqbal! Wouldn't You Rather Be Imad Ahmed? (0) comments Top Story: Rebecca C. Brown Reaches 200 Hits! Thursday, May 15, 2003
In Other News: Rebecca C. Brown's Blog Devolves into People Magazine-esque "Star Tracks" of ASUC Senators! Also: Final 2003-2004 Budget Posted! I went into Kinkos yesterday to drop off a FedEx, and I ran into Patrick who was makin' copies (the Pat-Meister!) in preparation for his upcoming finals. Honestly, he's one of nicest, most outgoing fellows that I've had the good fortune to (barely) meet. (I'd Rebeccommend to him and everyone else, though, to make your copies at ZeeZee or Krishna; Kinkos is a rip-off.) I wish I'd taken an interest in ASUC politics earlier. He also eerily reminds me of my very awesome roommate Greg. Also, if you didn't catch it on CalStuff, here's the link to the 2003-2004 final ASUC budget. Thanks again to the Senate for putting so much effort into allocating these limited funds fairly. I only have a comment or two. For one, I'm glad to see a good portion of the budget go towards student groups and especially publications. My lone beef is that the Berkeley Jewish Journal is receiving $900 when they should be losing their ASUC funding entirely. Last time I checked, ASUC-funded publications and student groups aren't allowed to endorse ASUC candidates. And it was fairly obvious that the candidate "suggestions" in the second to last issue of the BJJ this year were endorsements. Of course, they were prefaced with a note more or less saying, "No, we really promise these aren't endorsements, we just picked one candidate from each office about whom to say all these great things. But they sure aren't endorsements, nosireebob." Hmmm, a little more than suspect to me. That $900 could be going toward four new SISGs or another fledgling pub like Exit or Onyx or California Engineer. But otherwise, I'm pretty pleased with how the budget turned out. I can personally vouch that the Squelch will take its $2,150 cut in stride and for yet another year produce six awesome issues for the whole campus to enjoy. Don't forget to submit! (0) comments Senator Paul "The Spare" Lafata bowls a 118 in a stunning victory over fellow Apple members Tuesday, May 13, 2003
As a member of the Squelch editing staff, I think this is an important issue. Is the Squelch indeed lacking diversity, and how does that affect our role as an ASUC student group? Foremost, my personal goal as a Squelcher is to produce a high quality magazine that is as enjoyable and accessable as possible to ALL members of the campus, regardless of ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender, or disability (unless, of course, that disability is a total lack of sense of humor, in which case I have no interest in reaching out to you). After all, ALL students at this university donate $55 dollars a year to the ASUC whether or not they want to, so that money should go to interests that represent as many students as possible. This goal is acheived by having some of the money given to the Greek community, some to the Queer Resource Center, some to the Black Recruitment and Retention Center, and some to publications like Onyx Express and Hardboiled. By funding each of these groups, who in turn represent a certain faction of the campus, the ASUC is attempting to please as many students as they can. (Whether or not they acheive this goal is another matter entirely.) The Heuristic Squelch, on the other hand, is not aimed at a faction or a sub-group; we aim to please all! (The exception, again, being those folks out there with no senses of humor, or [worse] the kind of people who think Jay Leno is King of Late Night. It's Conan, you fools!) Does the fact that most our staff is white or Asian and male prevent us from entertaining an African American, Latino, or female audience? I'd like to say no. When I hand out issues on Sproul, my rough estimations conclude that we distribute proportionally to the ethnic make-up of our campus. That is, about 40% of the students who accept issues out of our hands are white, about 40% are Asian American, about 10% are Latino/Chicano, and about 3% (a sad number indeed) are African American. We seem to be reaching all members of the campus equally. (Aren't we?) It's important to bring up that the lack of diversity on the Squelch staff has nothing to do with our unwilingness to accept diversity. Since I joined the staff a year ago, the editors have not rejected a single article or piece of artwork submitted by and African American or Latino. Conversely, they/we haven't published a single submission by an African American or Latino. The fact is, non-White/Asians simply don't submit. Our meetings are open to everyone, and our submission email address certainly doesn't discriminate. I would love to see different types of people (as long as they're funny) contribute to our magazine, but they have to be willing to participate! The argument can be made that our sense of humor is "white" and therefore potential black/hispanic contributers feel too intimidated to submit. It could also be said that our humor is too "male" for women to feel comfortable coming to meetings or submitting online. The fact is, the only people who should feel uncomfortable or intimidated are unfunny people, who are very justified in feeling like outsiders (and stay out!). (My gender did not slow me down on my road towards Graphics Editorship. My abrasive personality may have.) This argument implies that there's a difference between "white" and "black" humor, which I don't think is an inherent difference so much as a difference that filmmakers and comedians like to perpetuate in order to capitalize on a market. This argument also implies that we could increase our minority readership by feigning "ethnic" humor, which would be embarassing and offensive to all. The jokes we have going are meant to be enjoyed by everyone and none of our material is targeted at a certain ethnic or gender group. I would love to know how others feel on this matter, as it applies to more student groups than just the Squelch. Each group has an obligation to spend your money prudently. Please leave comments if you have them. (By the way, if you pick up all six issues next year, you will have directly utilized $1.18 of your ASUC funds.) (0) comments Earlier today I posted the lyrics to Kermit's lovable and touching ode to his color, and I mistakenly linked the word "green" to the Greens political party instead of the legitimate Green Party for whom I feel so much affection. (This error was pointed out to my by Jeff, the mammalian operator of the Green Think blog. A wise man, by my standards.) My apologies to anyone whom I may have confused, however no apologies to anyone who thinks I'm a dope for being in the Green Party.
Astronomy 10 is often an easy way for Sociaology majors/atheletes to eliminate their Physical Science breadth requirement. For me it was an exciting an enilightening course that I would Rebeccommend to anyone interested in the grand processes of the universe. I opted not to wait for the Fall semester and Professor Fillipenko. Undoubtedly he is a fantastic professor, otherwise he wouldn't have earned the almost unanimous adulation he has received, and I'm in no way questioning how much he deserves his fame. However, I found that taking it this Spring with Professor Leo Blitz was a great experience, even if he doesn't juggle or pull quarters out of students' ears or whatever makes Fillipenko so great. My tip: don't bother buying the book, but borrow another astronomy book from a friend if you can (all intro astro books give you pretty much the same information, just with different page numers), and save yourself $60 that can instead go towards some new pants or 12 tickets to a Squelch comedy show. Also, don't bother taking notes; it's a big waste of paper, and all the information is online anyway. (0) comments |
In no way am I trying to affiliate my political beliefs with those of Mr. Frog or any other associated Muppets.
From the felt mouth of an amphibious genius (Mr. Kermit T. Frog):
It's not that easy being green;
Having to spend each day the color of the leaves.
When I think it could be nicer being red, or yellow or gold-
or something much more colorful like that.
It's not easy being green.
It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary things.
And people tend to pass you over 'cause you're not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water-
or stars in the sky.
But green's the color of Spring.
And green can be cool and friendly-like.
And green can be big like an ocean, or important
like a mountain, or tall like a tree.
When green is all there is to be
It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why?
Wonder, I am green and it'll do fine,
it's beautiful!
And I think it's what I want to be
(0) comments
A few final words on the Daily Cal thefts:
a) To whomever has stolen them: I sure hope you are recycling them or using them for a paper mache project or lining your birdcage with them. The last thing we need is more wasted paper destroying our planet.
b) Good for the Daily Cal for not buckling under the pressure of intimidation and theft. They owe no one an apology; the thieves owe the campus an apology for obstructing free speech (that furthermore only published facts, not fiction).
c) Did the "protesters" ever do anything to try try to block the Daily Cal website? Free speech will prevail with the help of (oh, god I can't believe I'm saying this) the Internet.
d) To those who, like myself, think the thieves are ignorant lawbreakers with complete disregard for free speech or reason, please don't start the finger-pointing game. It is likely that some DAAP and/or BAMN members were involved, but that in no way automatically incriminates anyone involved with either organization. Unfair categorization and the vigilante mindset is what spurred the thefts to begin with.
Good luck to everyone with the last two weeks of class.
(0) comments
Sunday, May 11, 2003
(And now for your reading pleasure....)
Some men hunt for sport,
Others hunt for food,
The only thing I'm hunting for,
Is an outfit that looks good...
See my vest, see my vest,
Made from real gorilla chest,
Feel this sweater, there's no better,
Than authentic Irish setter.
See this hat, 'twas my cat,
My evening wear - vampire bat,
These white slippers are albino
African endangered rhino.
Grizzly bear underwear,
Turtles' necks, I've got my share,
Beret of poodle, on my noodle
It shall rest,
Try my red robin suit,
It comes one breast or two,
See my vest, see my vest,
See my vest.
Like my loafers? Former gophers -
It was that or skin my chauffeurs,
But a greyhound fur tuxedo
Would be best,
So let's prepare these dogs,
Mrs. Potts: Kill two for matching clogs,
Burns: See my vest, see my vest,
Oh please, won't you see my vest.
(0) comments
Saturday, May 10, 2003
Whoever is stealing these Daily Cals must sleep in fairly late. Wednesday through Friday when issues were stolen, whenever I walked through Sproul between 9:30am and 10:00am, the newspapers were more than plentiful. My advice to potential trouble-makers: get up earlier.
Speaking of which...these thefts are an obviously an obstruction of free speech, and are counterproductive to the message that the thieves want to send. Let the readers see what is so terrible about the Daily Cal instead of deciding for us. Don't weaken your argument by hiding the evidence from the campus.
Also speaking of which...My opinions of the Gray article and the Kim Jong-Il were pretty well represented by the students who wrote into the Daily Cal under the headline "Daily Cal Should Not Buckle to Detractors." The consensus seems to be that Jong-Il is indeed a funny looking dude who just happens to be Asian. As Jessica Ham so insightfully noted in her editorial, "And heaven forbid a cartoon would be drawn with slanted eyes. If anyone else has a better way to draw Asian people, please share it with us. Should we just draw a stick figure with a sign above its head? Or maybe we should just draw everyone to look white. That wouldn't be racist at all."
Similarly, Michael Gray is a campus personality who broke the law and just happened to be African American. I absolutely agree that in general America's legal system unfairly targets non-whites, or more accurately, targets crimes prevalent in poor communities that "just happen" to be far and away non-white (for example, by prosecuting drug use with more fervency and severity than tax fraud). But publishing a picture of a football player because he was arrested is not such an example. Remember when the Daily Cal published a pcicture of arrested protester Mallory Moser? Was that unfair? She was an athelete, she got arrested, she had her photo published.
This oversensitivity is taking power away from those who have a legitimate argument about racism and sexism in our society: It is present, more common than most assume, and deinstitutionalized in such a way that it cannot easily be quatified or identified. However, publishing facts about a campus figure or drawing a caricature no more distorted than any cartoon of a white politician are not racist.
(0) comments
Recently taken from an intense dialog between me and my boyfriend....
Me: Hey, wanna make out?
Him: Later. First I want to read this Archie Comic.
Nice to know my competition is a fictitous redheaded boy from Riverdale.
(0) comments
If you've yet to familiarize yourself with my newest alternative to heroin, I highly recommend (or should I say Rebeccommend?) that you visit Homestar Runner. The best part is the Strong Bad emails, but the other toons are golden, too.
(0) comments
Friday, May 09, 2003
My colleague David and I were recently engaged in a heated debate: Could a chimpanzee be able to dress himself in an old-timey bathing suit? (That is, assuming it buttons up the front, and that he has a human helper to button his buttons.) He argues that, though very intelligent, a chimp could not navigate his way through such a complicated garment. I believe, however, that as humans we greatly underestimate animals (except dogs, whom we expect to do our taxes), and that a chimp could fit himself into the suit if given a demonstration and enough time (and maybe a peanut M&M waiting for him at the end of his trial).
(0) comments
So word on the street from last night's extended senate meeting:
Senator and EVP-elect Gustavo Mata was arguing against reinstating some of the Squelch's funding, and took a quick show of hands of who in the room reads what magazine. He named a few other magazines, and a pretty good number of folks raised their hands in recognition of the various pubs. Then, asserting that the Squelch isn't so special and shouldn't be getting so much funding, he asked how many poeple read the Squelch, only to be greeted by a room of almost all raised hands. My point exactly, Gustavo.
(This is a second-hand account of something David told me, but I think it's completely accurate. If you know otherwise, leave a Hear Ye!.)
(0) comments
Thursday, May 08, 2003
So have a gander at this. Coincidence? Sadly, most likely. But I think this genre of marine-humor is on the rise....I'll keep you posted!
This was written first, in May 2002.
This is from 11 months later.
In general, the Michigan Every Three Weekly is the college humor mag that shamelessly steals the Onion format most successfully. They're my favorite university publication, behind the Squelch, of course.
(0) comments
Wednesday, May 07, 2003
So this is me trying to make comments available. Oh, I rue the day I abandoned the Cal CS department!
(0) comments
So I'm new to this Bloggin' business, so my site is still very poopy (no comment options, only two links, bad design, etc.). Luckilly, no one's reading it just yet.
Currently, Heuristic Squelch Editor-in-Chief David J. Duman is awaiting his turn to appeal said magazine's massive funding cut before the ASUC. Chances are he'll be there until 7 in the morning before the budget is ratified. Ya see, it takes $21,000 a year to put out six issues of the Squelch. This past year we got $15,000 from the ASUC, with the remaining tab being raised through advertisement revenue. Two weeks ago, a few senators without significant opposition decided the ASUC would be better off giving Squelch $10,000. Ouch. So David's attempting to wheedle $12-14k out of the senate tonight.
I'd like to think that our magazine is important to the campus. We entertain, we enlighten. Okay, we entertain. But we give our fellow students 1,320,000 pages of hilarity each year (that's 20 pages per copy, 11,000 copies per issue, six issues a year) at just 1.14 cents per page if the ASUC gives us $15k. The cost-benefit analysis works heavily in our favor.
So speaking of funny jokes, read this.
(0) comments
Hey! You! Welcome to the pilot edition of my (shudder) NEW BLOG!
My idea is to have a swell forum for the discussion of various campus events/non-campus events. I'd also like to give my fellow Americans a taste of funny, so I'll offer links to humor sites, and post funny stuff, and do funny things, and maybe post some funny pictures. It'll be funny.
So if you have any good editorial or humor pieces floatin' around, hand 'em over.
(0) comments
a) To whomever has stolen them: I sure hope you are recycling them or using them for a paper mache project or lining your birdcage with them. The last thing we need is more wasted paper destroying our planet.
b) Good for the Daily Cal for not buckling under the pressure of intimidation and theft. They owe no one an apology; the thieves owe the campus an apology for obstructing free speech (that furthermore only published facts, not fiction).
c) Did the "protesters" ever do anything to try try to block the Daily Cal website? Free speech will prevail with the help of (oh, god I can't believe I'm saying this) the Internet.
d) To those who, like myself, think the thieves are ignorant lawbreakers with complete disregard for free speech or reason, please don't start the finger-pointing game. It is likely that some DAAP and/or BAMN members were involved, but that in no way automatically incriminates anyone involved with either organization. Unfair categorization and the vigilante mindset is what spurred the thefts to begin with.
Good luck to everyone with the last two weeks of class.
(0) comments
(And now for your reading pleasure....)
Some men hunt for sport,
Others hunt for food,
The only thing I'm hunting for,
Is an outfit that looks good...
See my vest, see my vest,
Made from real gorilla chest,
Feel this sweater, there's no better,
Than authentic Irish setter.
See this hat, 'twas my cat,
My evening wear - vampire bat,
These white slippers are albino
African endangered rhino.
Grizzly bear underwear,
Turtles' necks, I've got my share,
Beret of poodle, on my noodle
It shall rest,
Try my red robin suit,
It comes one breast or two,
See my vest, see my vest,
See my vest.
Like my loafers? Former gophers -
It was that or skin my chauffeurs,
But a greyhound fur tuxedo
Would be best,
So let's prepare these dogs,
Mrs. Potts: Kill two for matching clogs,
Burns: See my vest, see my vest,
Oh please, won't you see my vest.
(0) comments
Saturday, May 10, 2003
Whoever is stealing these Daily Cals must sleep in fairly late. Wednesday through Friday when issues were stolen, whenever I walked through Sproul between 9:30am and 10:00am, the newspapers were more than plentiful. My advice to potential trouble-makers: get up earlier.
Speaking of which...these thefts are an obviously an obstruction of free speech, and are counterproductive to the message that the thieves want to send. Let the readers see what is so terrible about the Daily Cal instead of deciding for us. Don't weaken your argument by hiding the evidence from the campus.
Also speaking of which...My opinions of the Gray article and the Kim Jong-Il were pretty well represented by the students who wrote into the Daily Cal under the headline "Daily Cal Should Not Buckle to Detractors." The consensus seems to be that Jong-Il is indeed a funny looking dude who just happens to be Asian. As Jessica Ham so insightfully noted in her editorial, "And heaven forbid a cartoon would be drawn with slanted eyes. If anyone else has a better way to draw Asian people, please share it with us. Should we just draw a stick figure with a sign above its head? Or maybe we should just draw everyone to look white. That wouldn't be racist at all."
Similarly, Michael Gray is a campus personality who broke the law and just happened to be African American. I absolutely agree that in general America's legal system unfairly targets non-whites, or more accurately, targets crimes prevalent in poor communities that "just happen" to be far and away non-white (for example, by prosecuting drug use with more fervency and severity than tax fraud). But publishing a picture of a football player because he was arrested is not such an example. Remember when the Daily Cal published a pcicture of arrested protester Mallory Moser? Was that unfair? She was an athelete, she got arrested, she had her photo published.
This oversensitivity is taking power away from those who have a legitimate argument about racism and sexism in our society: It is present, more common than most assume, and deinstitutionalized in such a way that it cannot easily be quatified or identified. However, publishing facts about a campus figure or drawing a caricature no more distorted than any cartoon of a white politician are not racist.
(0) comments
Recently taken from an intense dialog between me and my boyfriend....
Me: Hey, wanna make out?
Him: Later. First I want to read this Archie Comic.
Nice to know my competition is a fictitous redheaded boy from Riverdale.
(0) comments
If you've yet to familiarize yourself with my newest alternative to heroin, I highly recommend (or should I say Rebeccommend?) that you visit Homestar Runner. The best part is the Strong Bad emails, but the other toons are golden, too.
(0) comments
Friday, May 09, 2003
My colleague David and I were recently engaged in a heated debate: Could a chimpanzee be able to dress himself in an old-timey bathing suit? (That is, assuming it buttons up the front, and that he has a human helper to button his buttons.) He argues that, though very intelligent, a chimp could not navigate his way through such a complicated garment. I believe, however, that as humans we greatly underestimate animals (except dogs, whom we expect to do our taxes), and that a chimp could fit himself into the suit if given a demonstration and enough time (and maybe a peanut M&M waiting for him at the end of his trial).
(0) comments
So word on the street from last night's extended senate meeting:
Senator and EVP-elect Gustavo Mata was arguing against reinstating some of the Squelch's funding, and took a quick show of hands of who in the room reads what magazine. He named a few other magazines, and a pretty good number of folks raised their hands in recognition of the various pubs. Then, asserting that the Squelch isn't so special and shouldn't be getting so much funding, he asked how many poeple read the Squelch, only to be greeted by a room of almost all raised hands. My point exactly, Gustavo.
(This is a second-hand account of something David told me, but I think it's completely accurate. If you know otherwise, leave a Hear Ye!.)
(0) comments
Thursday, May 08, 2003
So have a gander at this. Coincidence? Sadly, most likely. But I think this genre of marine-humor is on the rise....I'll keep you posted!
This was written first, in May 2002.
This is from 11 months later.
In general, the Michigan Every Three Weekly is the college humor mag that shamelessly steals the Onion format most successfully. They're my favorite university publication, behind the Squelch, of course.
(0) comments
Wednesday, May 07, 2003
So this is me trying to make comments available. Oh, I rue the day I abandoned the Cal CS department!
(0) comments
So I'm new to this Bloggin' business, so my site is still very poopy (no comment options, only two links, bad design, etc.). Luckilly, no one's reading it just yet.
Currently, Heuristic Squelch Editor-in-Chief David J. Duman is awaiting his turn to appeal said magazine's massive funding cut before the ASUC. Chances are he'll be there until 7 in the morning before the budget is ratified. Ya see, it takes $21,000 a year to put out six issues of the Squelch. This past year we got $15,000 from the ASUC, with the remaining tab being raised through advertisement revenue. Two weeks ago, a few senators without significant opposition decided the ASUC would be better off giving Squelch $10,000. Ouch. So David's attempting to wheedle $12-14k out of the senate tonight.
I'd like to think that our magazine is important to the campus. We entertain, we enlighten. Okay, we entertain. But we give our fellow students 1,320,000 pages of hilarity each year (that's 20 pages per copy, 11,000 copies per issue, six issues a year) at just 1.14 cents per page if the ASUC gives us $15k. The cost-benefit analysis works heavily in our favor.
So speaking of funny jokes, read this.
(0) comments
Hey! You! Welcome to the pilot edition of my (shudder) NEW BLOG!
My idea is to have a swell forum for the discussion of various campus events/non-campus events. I'd also like to give my fellow Americans a taste of funny, so I'll offer links to humor sites, and post funny stuff, and do funny things, and maybe post some funny pictures. It'll be funny.
So if you have any good editorial or humor pieces floatin' around, hand 'em over.
(0) comments
Speaking of which...these thefts are an obviously an obstruction of free speech, and are counterproductive to the message that the thieves want to send. Let the readers see what is so terrible about the Daily Cal instead of deciding for us. Don't weaken your argument by hiding the evidence from the campus.
Also speaking of which...My opinions of the Gray article and the Kim Jong-Il were pretty well represented by the students who wrote into the Daily Cal under the headline "Daily Cal Should Not Buckle to Detractors." The consensus seems to be that Jong-Il is indeed a funny looking dude who just happens to be Asian. As Jessica Ham so insightfully noted in her editorial, "And heaven forbid a cartoon would be drawn with slanted eyes. If anyone else has a better way to draw Asian people, please share it with us. Should we just draw a stick figure with a sign above its head? Or maybe we should just draw everyone to look white. That wouldn't be racist at all."
Similarly, Michael Gray is a campus personality who broke the law and just happened to be African American. I absolutely agree that in general America's legal system unfairly targets non-whites, or more accurately, targets crimes prevalent in poor communities that "just happen" to be far and away non-white (for example, by prosecuting drug use with more fervency and severity than tax fraud). But publishing a picture of a football player because he was arrested is not such an example. Remember when the Daily Cal published a pcicture of arrested protester Mallory Moser? Was that unfair? She was an athelete, she got arrested, she had her photo published.
This oversensitivity is taking power away from those who have a legitimate argument about racism and sexism in our society: It is present, more common than most assume, and deinstitutionalized in such a way that it cannot easily be quatified or identified. However, publishing facts about a campus figure or drawing a caricature no more distorted than any cartoon of a white politician are not racist.
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Recently taken from an intense dialog between me and my boyfriend....
Me: Hey, wanna make out?
Him: Later. First I want to read this Archie Comic.
Nice to know my competition is a fictitous redheaded boy from Riverdale.
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If you've yet to familiarize yourself with my newest alternative to heroin, I highly recommend (or should I say Rebeccommend?) that you visit Homestar Runner. The best part is the Strong Bad emails, but the other toons are golden, too.
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Friday, May 09, 2003
My colleague David and I were recently engaged in a heated debate: Could a chimpanzee be able to dress himself in an old-timey bathing suit? (That is, assuming it buttons up the front, and that he has a human helper to button his buttons.) He argues that, though very intelligent, a chimp could not navigate his way through such a complicated garment. I believe, however, that as humans we greatly underestimate animals (except dogs, whom we expect to do our taxes), and that a chimp could fit himself into the suit if given a demonstration and enough time (and maybe a peanut M&M waiting for him at the end of his trial).
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So word on the street from last night's extended senate meeting:
Senator and EVP-elect Gustavo Mata was arguing against reinstating some of the Squelch's funding, and took a quick show of hands of who in the room reads what magazine. He named a few other magazines, and a pretty good number of folks raised their hands in recognition of the various pubs. Then, asserting that the Squelch isn't so special and shouldn't be getting so much funding, he asked how many poeple read the Squelch, only to be greeted by a room of almost all raised hands. My point exactly, Gustavo.
(This is a second-hand account of something David told me, but I think it's completely accurate. If you know otherwise, leave a Hear Ye!.)
(0) comments
Thursday, May 08, 2003
So have a gander at this. Coincidence? Sadly, most likely. But I think this genre of marine-humor is on the rise....I'll keep you posted!
This was written first, in May 2002.
This is from 11 months later.
In general, the Michigan Every Three Weekly is the college humor mag that shamelessly steals the Onion format most successfully. They're my favorite university publication, behind the Squelch, of course.
(0) comments
Wednesday, May 07, 2003
So this is me trying to make comments available. Oh, I rue the day I abandoned the Cal CS department!
(0) comments
So I'm new to this Bloggin' business, so my site is still very poopy (no comment options, only two links, bad design, etc.). Luckilly, no one's reading it just yet.
Currently, Heuristic Squelch Editor-in-Chief David J. Duman is awaiting his turn to appeal said magazine's massive funding cut before the ASUC. Chances are he'll be there until 7 in the morning before the budget is ratified. Ya see, it takes $21,000 a year to put out six issues of the Squelch. This past year we got $15,000 from the ASUC, with the remaining tab being raised through advertisement revenue. Two weeks ago, a few senators without significant opposition decided the ASUC would be better off giving Squelch $10,000. Ouch. So David's attempting to wheedle $12-14k out of the senate tonight.
I'd like to think that our magazine is important to the campus. We entertain, we enlighten. Okay, we entertain. But we give our fellow students 1,320,000 pages of hilarity each year (that's 20 pages per copy, 11,000 copies per issue, six issues a year) at just 1.14 cents per page if the ASUC gives us $15k. The cost-benefit analysis works heavily in our favor.
So speaking of funny jokes, read this.
(0) comments
Hey! You! Welcome to the pilot edition of my (shudder) NEW BLOG!
My idea is to have a swell forum for the discussion of various campus events/non-campus events. I'd also like to give my fellow Americans a taste of funny, so I'll offer links to humor sites, and post funny stuff, and do funny things, and maybe post some funny pictures. It'll be funny.
So if you have any good editorial or humor pieces floatin' around, hand 'em over.
(0) comments
(0) comments
My colleague David and I were recently engaged in a heated debate: Could a chimpanzee be able to dress himself in an old-timey bathing suit? (That is, assuming it buttons up the front, and that he has a human helper to button his buttons.) He argues that, though very intelligent, a chimp could not navigate his way through such a complicated garment. I believe, however, that as humans we greatly underestimate animals (except dogs, whom we expect to do our taxes), and that a chimp could fit himself into the suit if given a demonstration and enough time (and maybe a peanut M&M waiting for him at the end of his trial).
(0) comments
So word on the street from last night's extended senate meeting:
Senator and EVP-elect Gustavo Mata was arguing against reinstating some of the Squelch's funding, and took a quick show of hands of who in the room reads what magazine. He named a few other magazines, and a pretty good number of folks raised their hands in recognition of the various pubs. Then, asserting that the Squelch isn't so special and shouldn't be getting so much funding, he asked how many poeple read the Squelch, only to be greeted by a room of almost all raised hands. My point exactly, Gustavo.
(This is a second-hand account of something David told me, but I think it's completely accurate. If you know otherwise, leave a Hear Ye!.)
(0) comments
Thursday, May 08, 2003
So have a gander at this. Coincidence? Sadly, most likely. But I think this genre of marine-humor is on the rise....I'll keep you posted!
This was written first, in May 2002.
This is from 11 months later.
In general, the Michigan Every Three Weekly is the college humor mag that shamelessly steals the Onion format most successfully. They're my favorite university publication, behind the Squelch, of course.
(0) comments
Wednesday, May 07, 2003
So this is me trying to make comments available. Oh, I rue the day I abandoned the Cal CS department!
(0) comments
So I'm new to this Bloggin' business, so my site is still very poopy (no comment options, only two links, bad design, etc.). Luckilly, no one's reading it just yet.
Currently, Heuristic Squelch Editor-in-Chief David J. Duman is awaiting his turn to appeal said magazine's massive funding cut before the ASUC. Chances are he'll be there until 7 in the morning before the budget is ratified. Ya see, it takes $21,000 a year to put out six issues of the Squelch. This past year we got $15,000 from the ASUC, with the remaining tab being raised through advertisement revenue. Two weeks ago, a few senators without significant opposition decided the ASUC would be better off giving Squelch $10,000. Ouch. So David's attempting to wheedle $12-14k out of the senate tonight.
I'd like to think that our magazine is important to the campus. We entertain, we enlighten. Okay, we entertain. But we give our fellow students 1,320,000 pages of hilarity each year (that's 20 pages per copy, 11,000 copies per issue, six issues a year) at just 1.14 cents per page if the ASUC gives us $15k. The cost-benefit analysis works heavily in our favor.
So speaking of funny jokes, read this.
(0) comments
Hey! You! Welcome to the pilot edition of my (shudder) NEW BLOG!
My idea is to have a swell forum for the discussion of various campus events/non-campus events. I'd also like to give my fellow Americans a taste of funny, so I'll offer links to humor sites, and post funny stuff, and do funny things, and maybe post some funny pictures. It'll be funny.
So if you have any good editorial or humor pieces floatin' around, hand 'em over.
(0) comments
Senator and EVP-elect Gustavo Mata was arguing against reinstating some of the Squelch's funding, and took a quick show of hands of who in the room reads what magazine. He named a few other magazines, and a pretty good number of folks raised their hands in recognition of the various pubs. Then, asserting that the Squelch isn't so special and shouldn't be getting so much funding, he asked how many poeple read the Squelch, only to be greeted by a room of almost all raised hands. My point exactly, Gustavo.
(This is a second-hand account of something David told me, but I think it's completely accurate. If you know otherwise, leave a Hear Ye!.)
(0) comments
So have a gander at this. Coincidence? Sadly, most likely. But I think this genre of marine-humor is on the rise....I'll keep you posted!
This was written first, in May 2002.
This is from 11 months later.
In general, the Michigan Every Three Weekly is the college humor mag that shamelessly steals the Onion format most successfully. They're my favorite university publication, behind the Squelch, of course.
(0) comments
Wednesday, May 07, 2003
So this is me trying to make comments available. Oh, I rue the day I abandoned the Cal CS department!
(0) comments
So I'm new to this Bloggin' business, so my site is still very poopy (no comment options, only two links, bad design, etc.). Luckilly, no one's reading it just yet.
Currently, Heuristic Squelch Editor-in-Chief David J. Duman is awaiting his turn to appeal said magazine's massive funding cut before the ASUC. Chances are he'll be there until 7 in the morning before the budget is ratified. Ya see, it takes $21,000 a year to put out six issues of the Squelch. This past year we got $15,000 from the ASUC, with the remaining tab being raised through advertisement revenue. Two weeks ago, a few senators without significant opposition decided the ASUC would be better off giving Squelch $10,000. Ouch. So David's attempting to wheedle $12-14k out of the senate tonight.
I'd like to think that our magazine is important to the campus. We entertain, we enlighten. Okay, we entertain. But we give our fellow students 1,320,000 pages of hilarity each year (that's 20 pages per copy, 11,000 copies per issue, six issues a year) at just 1.14 cents per page if the ASUC gives us $15k. The cost-benefit analysis works heavily in our favor.
So speaking of funny jokes, read this.
(0) comments
Hey! You! Welcome to the pilot edition of my (shudder) NEW BLOG!
My idea is to have a swell forum for the discussion of various campus events/non-campus events. I'd also like to give my fellow Americans a taste of funny, so I'll offer links to humor sites, and post funny stuff, and do funny things, and maybe post some funny pictures. It'll be funny.
So if you have any good editorial or humor pieces floatin' around, hand 'em over.
(0) comments
(0) comments
So I'm new to this Bloggin' business, so my site is still very poopy (no comment options, only two links, bad design, etc.). Luckilly, no one's reading it just yet.
Currently, Heuristic Squelch Editor-in-Chief David J. Duman is awaiting his turn to appeal said magazine's massive funding cut before the ASUC. Chances are he'll be there until 7 in the morning before the budget is ratified. Ya see, it takes $21,000 a year to put out six issues of the Squelch. This past year we got $15,000 from the ASUC, with the remaining tab being raised through advertisement revenue. Two weeks ago, a few senators without significant opposition decided the ASUC would be better off giving Squelch $10,000. Ouch. So David's attempting to wheedle $12-14k out of the senate tonight.
I'd like to think that our magazine is important to the campus. We entertain, we enlighten. Okay, we entertain. But we give our fellow students 1,320,000 pages of hilarity each year (that's 20 pages per copy, 11,000 copies per issue, six issues a year) at just 1.14 cents per page if the ASUC gives us $15k. The cost-benefit analysis works heavily in our favor.
So speaking of funny jokes, read this.
(0) comments
Hey! You! Welcome to the pilot edition of my (shudder) NEW BLOG!
My idea is to have a swell forum for the discussion of various campus events/non-campus events. I'd also like to give my fellow Americans a taste of funny, so I'll offer links to humor sites, and post funny stuff, and do funny things, and maybe post some funny pictures. It'll be funny.
So if you have any good editorial or humor pieces floatin' around, hand 'em over.
(0) comments
My idea is to have a swell forum for the discussion of various campus events/non-campus events. I'd also like to give my fellow Americans a taste of funny, so I'll offer links to humor sites, and post funny stuff, and do funny things, and maybe post some funny pictures. It'll be funny.
So if you have any good editorial or humor pieces floatin' around, hand 'em over.
(0) comments